In-orbit or out-of-orbit

The last couple of days have been quite refreshing. Got a break from the regular routine of writing the functional specifications, executing the test cases, regular chit-chats about office politics, onsite opportunities, hikes and stuff.

I had been asked to attend behavioral training in the far-off Whitefield office which is situated in the global axis building opposite the famous Satya Sai hospital. The two days had been full of fun and activities.

Today being the second and last day, the training got over at 4 and we (me and a couple of gals) had one hour to go for the company bus so we strolled out with our backpacks and wandered to the much heard of new mall- The Inorbit Mall only to kill time.

Baskin Robins, Mad Over Donuts were there to welcome us. As we went inside there were other shops like Pepe jeans, Levis, And, UCB, Shoppers Stop all blaring loud and wooing the customers with their whooping discounts.

We window shopped in Pepe, Levis and finally in the 'And' store ,a friend of mine bought a leggings and we ventured into Shoppers Stop as i wanted to buy a jacket and was searching for the women section when all of a sudden the fire alarm went off.

My friends panicked and rushed  to the security to collect their bags and come out of the mall.

As we reached the security to collect the bags, he tried to pacify us saying that there was maintenance going on and the alarms were being tested. :p yet they were in no mood to listen and our wandering time had got over forcing us to return to our office just-in-time to board our buses..

Am thinking if the mall has to be renamed as 'out-of-orbit' instead of Inorbit :D ;)

Love- a fresh insight

Love is beautiful as long as it has two hearts in it than two minds thinking of it. 

Hearts and the innumerable feelings in it and its timely expression will keep the relationship alive rather than the application of the mind which rather pulls apart the two souls in the relationship as it more often than not tends to be narcissist in that it just thinks of the benefit from being together rather than the pleasure it can draw by caring, sharing, loving, expressing and trusting.. 

P.S: just now finished reading Nicholas Sparks-' The lucky one' which like all his novels make me pen my unexpressed thoughts in a million ways.. Well the novel encapsulates the lives of four people and how a photograph found accidentally in the battle ground changes their lives. It also emphasizes on the fact that its better to think with a calm mind even on encountering something that we wish is not true and also that we should try to find the reason behind the motive than put an abrupt end to the bond shared.

Which animal are you?

Last year during one of the behavioral trainings at office, we were asked to relate ourselves to any animal and draw a picture of the animal and justify the training team as to why we chose the animal?

Many people came up with animals such as turtle, duck, elephant, cow, fish, horse etc..

I chose to be an ant because of its hardworking nature, its concern for its present and future, its social nature: it prefers to be in a team and believes in teamwork. More importantly it prefers to mind its own until disturbed. Once disturbed it surely does teach a lesson. Also it has a never give up attitude which is very essential for one's survival in today's world.

Which animal are you? Ponder over and do leave a comment in the comment box :)

With love
Aar Kay :)
- Life is to be understood backwards but lived forwards

Miss you thatha

Its been 9 years since you left us yet the memories are afresh. It seems as though it was just yesterday that we bid our final adieu to you.

I remember my childhood where i would stand near the gate in the pretext of waiting for you while in reality i was looking forward for my dad's jeep. I remember how much you cared for me just because i stayed away from my parents. I remember those evenings as it were yesterday when you would first wipe the dirt off your TVS and then freshen up for the hot supper that was prepared specially for you. I remember the strain that you would undergo when you carried the heavy jackfruit or the watermelon which would be heavy for you to carry considering your ill health yet you wanted to make your grand children happy. I loved your never-say-die attitude.. You never gave up though it was impossible to do..

I loved you a lot in many ways yet i may not have told you..

I remember the tehkikaat, chitrahaar and other serials you watched on DD1 . Your interest and knowledge on all general things was commendable and also the unfailing memory of yours. You have had your shares of ups and downs in life yet you were strong

I do remember the day you came by walk to basaveshwarnagar where we stayed during your last days just to say that there was a new college that had been started at rajajinagar by one of the prestigious group of colleges. You believed in me when everyone were skeptical about my tenth results. 

Yet am sorry for being a scaredy cat. I wouldn't come near you when you were bed ridden.. Please forgive me.. I miss you thatha.. Please come back. I need you now more than at any other time..

I am sure you would be proud of both your grand children and also Sharath for we have made our little if not great accomplishments in life..

Yours
Ammani :(

woman's day

A happy women's day to all the women in my life.

Platinum day of love- a short story

Shrisha looked at her watch as the phone began to ring. It was five-thirty in the evening. She was surprised to see the caller's name as she was not expecting any call at that hour of the day let alone from the person who was calling her.

She noticed that her hand was shaking, but she ignored it and swept across the green circle on the phone's surface to answer the call. She put the phone to her ear,  clutching it so hard that she felt that it might snap and said 'hello' in a tight voice that barely sounded like hers. 

'hey shrisha.. Its me Suraj' he spoke immediately. Fearing that she would hang up on hearing his name he said 'I need to talk. Please don't drop the call' to which she replied 'hmmm.. Go on. Am listening'.

'how are you?'

'I'm fine. How about you?' 

'okay, doing okay. Are you in Bangalore on work?'

'yup. Would be leaving in a week. Are you still with cubed?'

'ya.'

Before she could say something, 'Can we get together Shrisha? Will you have time?' He muttered the courage to finally say the words which he had been holding onto since a long time.

She felt herself going weak on hearing these words. 'Yes. I'd like to see you. When?'

'Are you available this weekend? How about lunch tomorrow?'

'I can't. I have a meeting at 2 and cant afford to miss it so I can't really change it'

' thats okay. What about tomorrow evening? Are you free?'

'yes'

'shall we have dinner?'

'am afraid I cant go for dinner as it would be late to go home Suraj. How about coffee?'

'Okay. where shall I pick you from?'

'Come over to coffee lounge near Indiranagar. I'll be there'

'I'l come around six-thirty. Is that all right with you?'

'Its fine. See you then.'

'Great' he said and hung up.

She still couldn't believe that he had called up after three long years and he couldn't believe that she had agreed to meet him.

Next day he was there at the coffee shop at six-fifteen with a anxious look on his face. He kept looking at his watch every few seconds waiting eagerly to see her. Did she look the same or had she changed? Would she talk to him with the same intensity that they would speak? As he sat immersed in his thoughts, his cell phone began to ring bringing him back to reality. 

It was Shrisha's call and he thought she was calling at the last minute to cancel the coffee-meet.,but he was relieved when she asked him where he was seated. 

He saw her immediately, the moment she steeped in. She had worn a pink chiffon dress that suited her immaculately well. He just couldn't take his eyes off her. He swallowed, trying to get a grip on himself and then stared in surprise as she suddenly turned her head abruptly and saw him.

He saw her approaching him with a gait full of confidence and then she smiled. At that moment he realized how much he had missed her and his love for her. By then she had neared the table and he motioned her to sit down. 

She saw that he had chosen a small table near a window in a corner where they could talk without being interrupted often. A waiter was with them in an instant.

Suraj looked at her and raised a brow. 'the usual?'

She nodded.

'A Choco frappe and iced eskimo'

As the waiter disappeared, he looked at her intently and said 'You haven't changed. You look exactly the same as I saw you last time'

She nodded in approval and smiled at him weakly, wishing her heart would stop impounding the way it was. It took all of her self-control to cut his gaze and look elsewhere.

The waiter was back at the table to serve them their order and asked if they needed anything else. On getting an affirmative answer, the waiter walked away.

Once they were alone, Suraj smiled at her as he remembered the times they had spent together. 

She took a bite of her choco frappe and asked curiously, 'have you visited Bangalore in the past three years?'

'yes, quite a few times.'

'why dint you phone me?'

He reached out, put his hand over hers. 'i didn't feel I had the right. I was the one who brought an end to our relationship . I was positive you had probably met someone else by then, fallen in love, made a new life. Moved on.'

Shrisha gaped at him as she thought: fallen in love, moved on. How can he think that? Doesn't he know how much I loved him, with all my heart and soul. She sat right in her chair as her eyes welled with tears. She dint want to cry at-least not in-front of him. She looked away, blinked back her tears.
Having noticed the changed expression on her face he said 'I've upset you. What's wrong?'

'I'm surprised, that's all.. That you think I could move on. So quickly..'

'its been a long time.. Three years.'

' you haven't moved on. Our have you?'

He didn't answer at first and then he admitted, 'no, I haven't.'

Shrisha heaved a sigh of relief and said ' I may be crazy for telling you this and feeding your ego, in a way, I guess.' She paused, took a deep breath and finished softly. 'I love you. I always have and suppose I always will.'

He nodded, held her hand tightly in his. His gaze fixed on hers. 'Shrisha I love you too and cant imagine my life with someone else.'

She stared hard at him, her eyes narrowing. ' why dint you call me earlier? Weren't you ever tempted?

'Of course I was! I must have dialed your number innumerous times only to disconnect before it rang. But just as I told you, I thought I dint have the right for it was me who had ended our relationship. I also knew I had many problems to work out in my head.'

After a moment of silence he continued 'yesterday I realized that if I let go of you then you would be gone off forever'

Finally she said in a low voice, 'I've waited a long time for your call. I could hardly believe it was you. And ever since, I have been anxious until I saw you standing here waiting for me.'

He smiled, his eyes sparkled as he spoke, 'will you marry me?'

Suddenly she couldn't believe her ears as she heard the very words she had desperately waited to hear since a long time.

The time had finally come.. :)

Nothing is permanent..

In the cycle of nature there is no such thing as victory or defeat: there is only movement.
The winter struggles to reign supreme, but, in the end, is obliged to accept spring’s victory, which brings with it flowers and happiness.
The summer would like to make its warm days last for ever, because it believes that warmth is good for the earth, but, finally, it has to accept the arrival of autumn, which will allow the earth to rest.
The gazelle eats the grass and is devoured by the lion. It isn’t a matter of who is the strongest, but God’s way of showing us the cycle of death and resurrection.
And within that cycle there are neither winners nor losers, there are only stages that must be gone through. When the human heart understands this, it is free, able to accept difficult times and not be deceived by moments of glory.
Both will pass. One will succeed the other. And the cycle will continue until we liberate ourselves from the flesh and find the Divine Energy.
Therefore, when the fighter is in the ring – whether by his own choice or because unfathomable destiny has placed him there – may his spirit be filled with joy at the prospect of the fight ahead. If he holds on to his dignity and his honor, then, even if he loses the fight, he will never be defeated, because his soul will remain intact.
And he will blame no one for what is happening to him.
Ever since he fell in love for the first time and was rejected, he has known that this did not put paid to his ability to love.
What is true in love is also true in war

Re-posted from Paulo coelho's blog

A dream worth forgetting...

Swasthi awakened with a start, and after a moment she sat up, blinking, adjusting her eyes to the pre-dawn darkness. The room was filled with silence. She was still thinking of her dream, the first in the last twelve months, which was surreal.

She remained still, breathing deeply, pushing away the feeling, knowing that it was... just a feeling.

She lay on her bed thinking why she had got the dream when it couldn't materialize. But then, every happening has a validity, is vivid, lifelike; even now as she rested against the pillows, she recollected his face as she had seen his profile pic in a networking site a few months ago.

A tear droplet ran down her cheek making a blotch on the white pillow case having pink florets. She could feel the damp of the droplet and her thoughts took her to the world which she had dreamt when he was in her life. Slowly the tears turned out to be a small stream thus breaking the revire of her thoughts.

She sat up, switched on the bedside lamp, slid her legs across the floor and walked to the couch that lay at the other end of the room. She realized that she was bathed in sweat despite the chill.

She sat down on the couch, folded her legs, she could feel the chill of the wind that was seeping into the room through the crevice in the window. She was staring into the blank wall in front of her, contemplating the dream she had a few minutes back.

He was there beside her, talking to her in the same husky voice,  twitchy smile on his lips and  sparkle in his eyes. Post which he held her hand and apologized to her for having dumped her without any fore-warning despite knowing how much she loved him.

The dream was rooted in an uncanny reality and had shaken her. A question hovered over her mind.. Why the dream now that it has almost been an year since he had gotten married and had moved out of country along with his bride to set up a new home away from the home that they (swasthi and he) had imagined..

Does he even remember her? guess no.. He seemed to be very happy and adjusted to the life he had carved for himself.

The memories that they have had together came flooding through her mind. They had met through a common friend. What started off as casual friendship had turned out to be more in less than five months, the bond being such that they couldn't be without talking to each other and expressing their emotions for even a single day.

The second time they met, he took her for a ride on his bike. the brief handshake they had, had given her a frisson, and this shivery feeling ran through her spine. Like in the movies, he was seeing her through the rear view mirror and having sensed that she was blushing sitting behind.

Then they went to a coffee bar, ordered cold coffee for both of them and spoke as if there was no end. later he dropped her to the nearest stop where she could get a bus back home as she had refused his offer to be dropped near her home.

As he reached home, he called her to tell she looked gorgeous in the black kurta and the creame pant. She said he looked good in the green t-shirt. After hearing this he blew a first kiss to her over the phone which she reciprocated.

She was still thinking about that day when she heard the bark of the neighbour's dog that brought her to reality. Suddenly she sat up straighter and thought why she had got the dream which had him? it was then that she realized that she had dozed off while reading the fiction- secret wishlist by her favorite author Preeti Shenoy. She was reading the part wherein the protagonist makes a secret wishlist due to her cousin's force.

It dawned to her then that though she had started believing that she had moved on in life, she still loved him. Suddenly there was a wrench in her stomach and her hand slid from across her chest to clutch her stomach. Tears started rolling down and she let them flow, sobbing as though her heart would break, until finally there were no tears left in her.

Glancing at the small clock on her bedside table she saw that it was already four a.m. On an impulse she so wanted to tell him what happened, but stopped and pushed herself up out of the coach very purposefully, and, turning off the lamp, she went back to bed.

He was married to someone else and that was that. Sadly, she was  still single.

Horanadu trip

The serpentine roads lined by lush green trees on both sides,at times the trees forming canopies barring sunlight from reaching the ground below. The splendid view of mountains, thatched houses, the rivulets disappearing into nowhere, the cows grazing, the luxuriously grown paddy fields, the slopy coffee plantations, the intertwined pepper and beetel creepers, the chirping of birds, awesome sunrise and sunset, the laidback lifestyle… what more can a frustrated soul need to rejuvenate?

These were the lovely sights on which I could lay my eyes on over the weekend. I had been on a temple- tour to Horanadu and Sringeri which lie the Dakshina Kannada district of Karnataka. In addition to these, there were a few spells of rain to soothe my tension ridden nerves. A special thanks to Manipal for giving me my much awaited break.

We (me, sis, uncle and aunt) started from bangalore on friday night . Due to extended weekend there was an hour’s delay to board the bus. On boarding the bus, the blissful journey started. Next day the early morning greeted me with a plesant sight of mist laden mountains which brought me memories of the Delhi-Amritsar trip. We reached Horanadu that lies amidst the western Ghats and on the banks of the sowparnika River at 7:30. We refreshed and had a cup of coffee and went to get a darshan of Goddess Annapoorna who is said to bestow her devotees with abundant food. After which we returned to our cottage and rested for a while post which the 3.5 hour journey to Sringeri- the abode of goddess Shardamba- the bestower of knowledge started.

The road connecting the Horanadu- Sringeri was ecstatic . Sometimes the sharp curves were sending cold jibes across my spine.
On reaching Sringeri, we checked into our room and went on an evening stroll in the vehicle free roads and later went to the temple. After getting the darshan of the goddess we went to the sit on the banks of the Tunga which was flowing as though there was no end.

The next day again we went to the temple and crossed the tunga on the overbridge to see the Swamiji’s enclave. The serene surroundings , the walk uphill on the kutcha road to the kalabhairaveshwara temple has left an imprint on me.

Later we went to Kalasa to get the blessings of Rushyashrungeshwara which is around 10 kms from Sringeri. We returned to Sringeri,  rested till evening and packed our bags to head back to the concrete jungle J

Am i a prisoner of my thoughts or its owner?

As I sit back and wonder if I am a master or a prisoner of my thoughts, I realize that sometimes I control what I think and at other times my thoughts over power me and are responsible for my life’s actions. The quality of our thoughts in turn depend on the people who surround us. These people may either elevate us or pull us down thus eventually impacting the progression of our lives.

For instance, at times of uncertainty if we surround ourselves with people who elevate us, we tend to achieve things beyond our capacity.. Yet a lot of people around us are mostly negative . be it due to their jealousies or fears they would not want you to do things just cos they will not be able to do it.

As written in the book ‘Secret’ by Rhonda Byrne, 'our thoughts become things'. There is an illustration of thoughts materializing into things wherein a person imagines having a feather with a particular pattern on it. One day as he is about to enter his office building, he stumbles upon exactly the same feather. Such is the power of thought.

When we want good things to happen to us, we must attract them by thinking that it is already a part of our lives.

Similarly if we brood over unwanted things, we are in turn  attracting them into our lives thus allowing bad things to happen to us.

Lastly let go of unwanted things and think of only positive things thus making our lives better.

‘It takes but one positive thought when given a chance to survive and thrive an entire army of negative thoughts’