Why are we resilient to Change?

Why are we resilient to change?- be it changing ourselves for good or the surroundings that we live or even the material possessions that we own or as a matter of fact our work place?

Though the 'change' is for something better, we feel insecure and also unsure of what the future has in store for us. It is always hard to let go- be it humans or the material possessions.

Most people are fearful of change because they don't believe they have any control over how or when it happens to them. Since change happens either to the individual or by the individual, what matters most is the attitude we have about change.

During my high school days, i had read the book 'Who moved my Cheese?' by Spencer Johnson. The book describes the changes in one's work and life, and four typical reactions to the said change by two mice "Sniff" and "Scurry," and two little people,"Hem" and "Haw.", during their hunt for cheese.

Likewise i see a lot of people whose lives turn for good yet they keep cribbing about trivial issues like weather, transport, traffic etc.

Can people ever accept life as it comes to them without much qualms?

What to do instead of gnawing about change? (As written by 'Haw' on finding the new cheese station)

1.Change Happens - They Keep Moving The Cheese

2.Anticipate Change - Get Ready For The Cheese To Move

3.Monitor Change- Smell The Cheese Often So You Know When It Is Getting Old

4.Adapt To Change Quickly- The Quicker You Let Go Of Old Cheese, The Sooner You Can Enjoy New Cheese

5.Change- Move With The Cheese

6. Enjoy Change!- Savor The Adventure And Enjoy The Taste Of New Cheese!

7. Be Ready To Change Quickly And Enjoy It Again- They Keep Moving The Cheese

Rather than focusing only on the negative impact due to change, let's embrace the change for the betterment of ourselves. Remember if the caterpillar was resilient to change then we wouldn't see the butterfly

'Don't be afraid to change for you may lose something good but may gain something better'.

P.S. This post was written when i was having butterflies to replace my phone that i had been using since 7th August 2011. I got a new phone as a birthday gift from my sister :) 

Power of thoughts

There is a saying which goes like this: watch your thoughts for they become your words, watch your words for they become your actions..

This indicates that thoughts directly or indirectly control your life and its actions. So be careful about what you think. If you think positive, you can achieve miracles. If you are negative even the simplest of the tasks becomes tough.

There is one story to illustrate the effects of negative thoughts and actions: In some part of the world, there is a village in which of the villagers need firewood from a tree which is lush and green, all of them surround it and curse it the result of which makes the tree go dry and eventually die from which they collect dry wood for their livelihood.

Similarly the power train of thoughts in one's mind can make or break the person's life. For instance the cricketer Yuvraj Singh and the actress Manisha Koirala were able to cure themselves from the bout of cancer mainly due to the positivity that they had. From my personal experience, my grand dad was able to overcome his first bout of cancer due to his positivity and later succumbed to it when it returned three years later just because he gave up on himself and his life.

So beware of what you think.. Be positive (not only in terms of blood group but also in your thoughts). Nothing is ever unattainable.

Quarter life crisis

Well no prizes for guessing the meaning of the post title.

Let me explain the meaning for most of us who are coming across this word for the first time. We all have heard and known what is meant by a mid-life crisis which is a fear or feeling for people in age group 35-50 who have spent half of their lives. It is the time of their life wherein they have everything set in their life- earning a decent salary, a good and understanding family, a planned retirement, a top and comfortable position in the company that they are working for quite some time now, less of reporting to somebody else and lot of being reported to about the what, hows etc. Yet a question looms as to if the wealth he or she has accumulated is enough to take care of the family till the end, if the right decisions have been made in the past, about the careers and the education of the children, if their spouses still love them the same etc and what is it that could have been done better?

Coming back to the blog title, it is a question that hovers in the minds of most of them in the age group - 25 to 30. Most of them would have completed their graduation (provided they have not had a lot of year-backs) and would have added a minimum of 2+ years of professional experience and a few travels to their curriculum vitae. It is that age wherein the gloominess of everything sets in. Till the age of 22 or 23 we would be taken care off well by our parents and the only tensions that we have in our lives would be those of exams and more often than not of heart-breaks. Our parents and all elders would have been asking us to just concentrate on our studies as our grades will pave a way for our grandeur future. Well when we are in our mid-20's we realise that the student days were the best days of our lives as everyday now we face a different exam. Earlier trusting someone would be easier but having faced the brutal world, it becomes difficult to trust our own self. Adding fuel to the confusions, we start doubting our capabilities and also wonder if we have made the right career choice for ourselves, friends drift apart as there is less time for self let alone friends. Even if we break this barrier and try to make time for friends, a wave of uncertainty glooms in when the same friends who would be ready to do anything for you and viceversa do nothing apart from boasting off their minor (and major) accomplishments.

Long term friendships, relationships come to an end abruptly. Love, trust, understanding give way for doubt, ego and pride. The child like self-confidence of winning the world over will make way for self-doubt.

During college days there would be constraints on the money. Now inspite of having thousands and lakhs of rupees in our accounts we seldom have time or friends to share our feelings.

We realise that the canteen-chai and samosas were more tastier as there would be people and ample time to share it with and also do masti as against the heavy wallets that gives you the freedom to choose the 5-star or 7-star hotel of your choice yet no one for company or time.

All these make people mature and grow old fast.. Do you have the time to spend with friends or friends to spend time with?

Cherish each moment for the time spent is the time lost..


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Workaholic me!!!

People in my close circles often feel that I am very much career-oriented, a go-getter, a workaholic who refrains from living 'life'.
Seldom do they know or understand the continuous rumblings if my mind which have taken the better on me and overpowered me, rendering me helpless.

Little did I know the consequences of doing something which everyone do. Nor was I lucky enough to enjoy to taste the fruit of the hard work.

I chose myself to be busy always so that my mind (as well as the heart) dint get much of free time to do trampoline as and when it wished.

I chose to pursue my dream of having a PG degree. I was too involved in my own routine to even breathe in the past sixteen months that today I dread at the thought of Friday evenings for which most people of my age look forward to so that they can have their 'their' time which includes hanging out with friends, family etc. The so called busy schedule came to an end this may when my theory classes got over and since then the Friday and Saturday nights are the most difficult to spend without thinking of the past happenings of life.

Lastly to all people I know and who are close to me, all I wanted to tell you is, I love doing a lot of things. For instance-travel, read novels, listen to mind-soothing music, draw, paint, write, watch movies with my good friends which I fully intend to do.

I need the right push and companionship to pursue my interests and mainly the courage to get over my fears of various things that makes a long list

Luv you all for giving me my time and space..

Am i a prisoner of my thoughts or its owner?

As I sit back and wonder if I am a master or a prisoner of my thoughts, I realize that sometimes I control what I think and at other times my thoughts over power me and are responsible for my life’s actions. The quality of our thoughts in turn depend on the people who surround us. These people may either elevate us or pull us down thus eventually impacting the progression of our lives.

For instance, at times of uncertainty if we surround ourselves with people who elevate us, we tend to achieve things beyond our capacity.. Yet a lot of people around us are mostly negative . be it due to their jealousies or fears they would not want you to do things just cos they will not be able to do it.

As written in the book ‘Secret’ by Rhonda Byrne, 'our thoughts become things'. There is an illustration of thoughts materializing into things wherein a person imagines having a feather with a particular pattern on it. One day as he is about to enter his office building, he stumbles upon exactly the same feather. Such is the power of thought.

When we want good things to happen to us, we must attract them by thinking that it is already a part of our lives.

Similarly if we brood over unwanted things, we are in turn  attracting them into our lives thus allowing bad things to happen to us.

Lastly let go of unwanted things and think of only positive things thus making our lives better.

‘It takes but one positive thought when given a chance to survive and thrive an entire army of negative thoughts’

Dear Life....

Sometimes you make me happy by giving me all that I ask from you and sometimes what you give is not even close to what I can think of. You encompass both good and bad, beauty and ugly and present it in your own form and make us wonder your capabilities of making things happen. When I look back and also regard the present, I realize that your richness lies is in bringing all these experiences together and weaving a beautiful tapestry of them.

You make me hasten my pace when am slow and apply a brake if am too fast by making me sick thus asking me to slow-down, allowing me to rest and emerge fitter and stronger. You have showed me that when I say “yes” to you, it means I should be ready to accept the good, bad and the ugly . You seem to be like an ever-flowing river that flows smoothly and turns around obstacles and difficulties. You have taught me to look beyond the difficulties that come my way thus making me more self-reliable and confident.

You squeeze me like a lemon to bring out the best in me by offering more stress and obstacles. You force me into accepting responsibilities, care for others and thus return to you what I have received from you.

 
In the course of time, many things have happened , but not every happening is significant. I have now learned to skip and not mull over or get bogged down by happenings that could have been accidental, coincidental or negative, and therefore they do not say much to me anymore..

 

You have taught me that one can lead life to the fullest by making use of our time effectively. Though there is ample time in our means, we should only undertake what we are capable of and also see to it that others benefit from our existence and not be the reason for the destruction

You have helped me understand the real me and have taught me that I have the best gift of self

Am a lot braver today than what I had been a couple of years ago. You have taught me to give more than to receive, love than to hate, forget than to remember , chill than be stressed..

Having said all these i expect you to treat me fairly and help me in moving ahead

Regards

Live your Passion :)

On reading a post Drift Mode from my favorite blogger cum writer-  Preeti  gave food for my thought.

All of us are apprehensive of the repercussions that come our way when we try doing something that we always wanted to do. Not everyone gets the required support or have the courage to go-ahead and listen to our heart. Once we set forth in the direction of doing what we actually intend to do, we are filling our lives with immense happiness and we will not live with regrets. ‘What if I had done this?’ can be the worst feeling one can have since our lives are so short-lived and we get to live our lives only once

  






 


Yet most of us succumb to the familial pressures or the societal fears or lack of courage that we restrain ourselves from going forward. If we succeed, people praise us to stardom else we become the topic to talk about. In either case we are going to be the topic of gossip. What we fail to realize is everything is ephemeral.

 

Once we try to venture out of the ‘comfort’ zone that we bind ourselves, there is no stopping. If we are not sure as to what is it that captivates us, then it is time that we sit-back and question ourselves as to what will be the one thing we would like to do if we thought that today is going to be our last day? Or as told by Preeti in her blog, we should silence our minds and listen to our hearts which we tend to ignore most of the times.

Live as if there is no tomorrow. Worry not of the failures as they will definitely help you grow. Lastly Mistakes do happen, just learn not to repeat them again and learn everything that life has to offer you.

And if things go wrong, just say –“Things are yet to happen. Life is yet to go. This is just a bend not an end”

Every journey starts with a single step so look forward to achieve your goals but be quick in stepping b’coz life is too short and dreams are too high

The capacity to behold life is beautiful

"I treasure my childhood for if i forget it, the child in me will die.."

At the source of a river, we have no idea of the path it will take to reach its confluence. Yet, I meet countless people like me anxious about picking the right job and the company, over-planning our careers. The usual refrain is: how will this job help me in my career?

I sometimes feel that in our anxiety to carve the perfect path, we overlook the importance of the smallest jobs and forget that in our early lives, job itself is immaterial. Whatsoever material is the work ethnic we build.

Have read somewhere that our first, second or perhaps even the third job doesn’t build or shape our careers; the respect, patience, affection and gratitude with which we treat our job and the people in it does.

While in 20’s, life allows us to rewind and reconsider our choices.. yet without the people around us, without their warmth and affection, we wont last even a single day

Our life is a wonderful gift,  unique to us. what matters the most is how the lessons we learn from it leads us to our own reflection and our own life lessons. Nothing is going to work better than that and more than just living our lives, the capacity to behold it is even more beautiful.. 

Journey of life ...

WHY THINGS ARE USUAL?????
when things are extreme and heart breaking for some one,
how can same thing become"usual" for someone

...
when things are heart pounding,
when things taking life of someone,
how can same thing become"usual" for someone

when things are beyond the limits,
when things are the beneath the earth,

when things are disgusting,
how can same thing become"usual" for someone

when things are converting some one's smile into tear
some one's life into fear,
how can same thing become"usual" for someone

life is too dramatic...
same thing can be a reason of some one's smile...

today i realized that the reason for the tear in my eyes has turned to be a smile on the other person's face. i cherish the time spent together but am unable to figure out what is it that is holding me back