Platinum day of love- a short story

Shrisha looked at her watch as the phone began to ring. It was five-thirty in the evening. She was surprised to see the caller's name as she was not expecting any call at that hour of the day let alone from the person who was calling her.

She noticed that her hand was shaking, but she ignored it and swept across the green circle on the phone's surface to answer the call. She put the phone to her ear,  clutching it so hard that she felt that it might snap and said 'hello' in a tight voice that barely sounded like hers. 

'hey shrisha.. Its me Suraj' he spoke immediately. Fearing that she would hang up on hearing his name he said 'I need to talk. Please don't drop the call' to which she replied 'hmmm.. Go on. Am listening'.

'how are you?'

'I'm fine. How about you?' 

'okay, doing okay. Are you in Bangalore on work?'

'yup. Would be leaving in a week. Are you still with cubed?'

'ya.'

Before she could say something, 'Can we get together Shrisha? Will you have time?' He muttered the courage to finally say the words which he had been holding onto since a long time.

She felt herself going weak on hearing these words. 'Yes. I'd like to see you. When?'

'Are you available this weekend? How about lunch tomorrow?'

'I can't. I have a meeting at 2 and cant afford to miss it so I can't really change it'

' thats okay. What about tomorrow evening? Are you free?'

'yes'

'shall we have dinner?'

'am afraid I cant go for dinner as it would be late to go home Suraj. How about coffee?'

'Okay. where shall I pick you from?'

'Come over to coffee lounge near Indiranagar. I'll be there'

'I'l come around six-thirty. Is that all right with you?'

'Its fine. See you then.'

'Great' he said and hung up.

She still couldn't believe that he had called up after three long years and he couldn't believe that she had agreed to meet him.

Next day he was there at the coffee shop at six-fifteen with a anxious look on his face. He kept looking at his watch every few seconds waiting eagerly to see her. Did she look the same or had she changed? Would she talk to him with the same intensity that they would speak? As he sat immersed in his thoughts, his cell phone began to ring bringing him back to reality. 

It was Shrisha's call and he thought she was calling at the last minute to cancel the coffee-meet.,but he was relieved when she asked him where he was seated. 

He saw her immediately, the moment she steeped in. She had worn a pink chiffon dress that suited her immaculately well. He just couldn't take his eyes off her. He swallowed, trying to get a grip on himself and then stared in surprise as she suddenly turned her head abruptly and saw him.

He saw her approaching him with a gait full of confidence and then she smiled. At that moment he realized how much he had missed her and his love for her. By then she had neared the table and he motioned her to sit down. 

She saw that he had chosen a small table near a window in a corner where they could talk without being interrupted often. A waiter was with them in an instant.

Suraj looked at her and raised a brow. 'the usual?'

She nodded.

'A Choco frappe and iced eskimo'

As the waiter disappeared, he looked at her intently and said 'You haven't changed. You look exactly the same as I saw you last time'

She nodded in approval and smiled at him weakly, wishing her heart would stop impounding the way it was. It took all of her self-control to cut his gaze and look elsewhere.

The waiter was back at the table to serve them their order and asked if they needed anything else. On getting an affirmative answer, the waiter walked away.

Once they were alone, Suraj smiled at her as he remembered the times they had spent together. 

She took a bite of her choco frappe and asked curiously, 'have you visited Bangalore in the past three years?'

'yes, quite a few times.'

'why dint you phone me?'

He reached out, put his hand over hers. 'i didn't feel I had the right. I was the one who brought an end to our relationship . I was positive you had probably met someone else by then, fallen in love, made a new life. Moved on.'

Shrisha gaped at him as she thought: fallen in love, moved on. How can he think that? Doesn't he know how much I loved him, with all my heart and soul. She sat right in her chair as her eyes welled with tears. She dint want to cry at-least not in-front of him. She looked away, blinked back her tears.
Having noticed the changed expression on her face he said 'I've upset you. What's wrong?'

'I'm surprised, that's all.. That you think I could move on. So quickly..'

'its been a long time.. Three years.'

' you haven't moved on. Our have you?'

He didn't answer at first and then he admitted, 'no, I haven't.'

Shrisha heaved a sigh of relief and said ' I may be crazy for telling you this and feeding your ego, in a way, I guess.' She paused, took a deep breath and finished softly. 'I love you. I always have and suppose I always will.'

He nodded, held her hand tightly in his. His gaze fixed on hers. 'Shrisha I love you too and cant imagine my life with someone else.'

She stared hard at him, her eyes narrowing. ' why dint you call me earlier? Weren't you ever tempted?

'Of course I was! I must have dialed your number innumerous times only to disconnect before it rang. But just as I told you, I thought I dint have the right for it was me who had ended our relationship. I also knew I had many problems to work out in my head.'

After a moment of silence he continued 'yesterday I realized that if I let go of you then you would be gone off forever'

Finally she said in a low voice, 'I've waited a long time for your call. I could hardly believe it was you. And ever since, I have been anxious until I saw you standing here waiting for me.'

He smiled, his eyes sparkled as he spoke, 'will you marry me?'

Suddenly she couldn't believe her ears as she heard the very words she had desperately waited to hear since a long time.

The time had finally come.. :)

Nothing is permanent..

In the cycle of nature there is no such thing as victory or defeat: there is only movement.
The winter struggles to reign supreme, but, in the end, is obliged to accept spring’s victory, which brings with it flowers and happiness.
The summer would like to make its warm days last for ever, because it believes that warmth is good for the earth, but, finally, it has to accept the arrival of autumn, which will allow the earth to rest.
The gazelle eats the grass and is devoured by the lion. It isn’t a matter of who is the strongest, but God’s way of showing us the cycle of death and resurrection.
And within that cycle there are neither winners nor losers, there are only stages that must be gone through. When the human heart understands this, it is free, able to accept difficult times and not be deceived by moments of glory.
Both will pass. One will succeed the other. And the cycle will continue until we liberate ourselves from the flesh and find the Divine Energy.
Therefore, when the fighter is in the ring – whether by his own choice or because unfathomable destiny has placed him there – may his spirit be filled with joy at the prospect of the fight ahead. If he holds on to his dignity and his honor, then, even if he loses the fight, he will never be defeated, because his soul will remain intact.
And he will blame no one for what is happening to him.
Ever since he fell in love for the first time and was rejected, he has known that this did not put paid to his ability to love.
What is true in love is also true in war

Re-posted from Paulo coelho's blog

A dream worth forgetting...

Swasthi awakened with a start, and after a moment she sat up, blinking, adjusting her eyes to the pre-dawn darkness. The room was filled with silence. She was still thinking of her dream, the first in the last twelve months, which was surreal.

She remained still, breathing deeply, pushing away the feeling, knowing that it was... just a feeling.

She lay on her bed thinking why she had got the dream when it couldn't materialize. But then, every happening has a validity, is vivid, lifelike; even now as she rested against the pillows, she recollected his face as she had seen his profile pic in a networking site a few months ago.

A tear droplet ran down her cheek making a blotch on the white pillow case having pink florets. She could feel the damp of the droplet and her thoughts took her to the world which she had dreamt when he was in her life. Slowly the tears turned out to be a small stream thus breaking the revire of her thoughts.

She sat up, switched on the bedside lamp, slid her legs across the floor and walked to the couch that lay at the other end of the room. She realized that she was bathed in sweat despite the chill.

She sat down on the couch, folded her legs, she could feel the chill of the wind that was seeping into the room through the crevice in the window. She was staring into the blank wall in front of her, contemplating the dream she had a few minutes back.

He was there beside her, talking to her in the same husky voice,  twitchy smile on his lips and  sparkle in his eyes. Post which he held her hand and apologized to her for having dumped her without any fore-warning despite knowing how much she loved him.

The dream was rooted in an uncanny reality and had shaken her. A question hovered over her mind.. Why the dream now that it has almost been an year since he had gotten married and had moved out of country along with his bride to set up a new home away from the home that they (swasthi and he) had imagined..

Does he even remember her? guess no.. He seemed to be very happy and adjusted to the life he had carved for himself.

The memories that they have had together came flooding through her mind. They had met through a common friend. What started off as casual friendship had turned out to be more in less than five months, the bond being such that they couldn't be without talking to each other and expressing their emotions for even a single day.

The second time they met, he took her for a ride on his bike. the brief handshake they had, had given her a frisson, and this shivery feeling ran through her spine. Like in the movies, he was seeing her through the rear view mirror and having sensed that she was blushing sitting behind.

Then they went to a coffee bar, ordered cold coffee for both of them and spoke as if there was no end. later he dropped her to the nearest stop where she could get a bus back home as she had refused his offer to be dropped near her home.

As he reached home, he called her to tell she looked gorgeous in the black kurta and the creame pant. She said he looked good in the green t-shirt. After hearing this he blew a first kiss to her over the phone which she reciprocated.

She was still thinking about that day when she heard the bark of the neighbour's dog that brought her to reality. Suddenly she sat up straighter and thought why she had got the dream which had him? it was then that she realized that she had dozed off while reading the fiction- secret wishlist by her favorite author Preeti Shenoy. She was reading the part wherein the protagonist makes a secret wishlist due to her cousin's force.

It dawned to her then that though she had started believing that she had moved on in life, she still loved him. Suddenly there was a wrench in her stomach and her hand slid from across her chest to clutch her stomach. Tears started rolling down and she let them flow, sobbing as though her heart would break, until finally there were no tears left in her.

Glancing at the small clock on her bedside table she saw that it was already four a.m. On an impulse she so wanted to tell him what happened, but stopped and pushed herself up out of the coach very purposefully, and, turning off the lamp, she went back to bed.

He was married to someone else and that was that. Sadly, she was  still single.

Horanadu trip

The serpentine roads lined by lush green trees on both sides,at times the trees forming canopies barring sunlight from reaching the ground below. The splendid view of mountains, thatched houses, the rivulets disappearing into nowhere, the cows grazing, the luxuriously grown paddy fields, the slopy coffee plantations, the intertwined pepper and beetel creepers, the chirping of birds, awesome sunrise and sunset, the laidback lifestyle… what more can a frustrated soul need to rejuvenate?

These were the lovely sights on which I could lay my eyes on over the weekend. I had been on a temple- tour to Horanadu and Sringeri which lie the Dakshina Kannada district of Karnataka. In addition to these, there were a few spells of rain to soothe my tension ridden nerves. A special thanks to Manipal for giving me my much awaited break.

We (me, sis, uncle and aunt) started from bangalore on friday night . Due to extended weekend there was an hour’s delay to board the bus. On boarding the bus, the blissful journey started. Next day the early morning greeted me with a plesant sight of mist laden mountains which brought me memories of the Delhi-Amritsar trip. We reached Horanadu that lies amidst the western Ghats and on the banks of the sowparnika River at 7:30. We refreshed and had a cup of coffee and went to get a darshan of Goddess Annapoorna who is said to bestow her devotees with abundant food. After which we returned to our cottage and rested for a while post which the 3.5 hour journey to Sringeri- the abode of goddess Shardamba- the bestower of knowledge started.

The road connecting the Horanadu- Sringeri was ecstatic . Sometimes the sharp curves were sending cold jibes across my spine.
On reaching Sringeri, we checked into our room and went on an evening stroll in the vehicle free roads and later went to the temple. After getting the darshan of the goddess we went to the sit on the banks of the Tunga which was flowing as though there was no end.

The next day again we went to the temple and crossed the tunga on the overbridge to see the Swamiji’s enclave. The serene surroundings , the walk uphill on the kutcha road to the kalabhairaveshwara temple has left an imprint on me.

Later we went to Kalasa to get the blessings of Rushyashrungeshwara which is around 10 kms from Sringeri. We returned to Sringeri,  rested till evening and packed our bags to head back to the concrete jungle J

Am i a prisoner of my thoughts or its owner?

As I sit back and wonder if I am a master or a prisoner of my thoughts, I realize that sometimes I control what I think and at other times my thoughts over power me and are responsible for my life’s actions. The quality of our thoughts in turn depend on the people who surround us. These people may either elevate us or pull us down thus eventually impacting the progression of our lives.

For instance, at times of uncertainty if we surround ourselves with people who elevate us, we tend to achieve things beyond our capacity.. Yet a lot of people around us are mostly negative . be it due to their jealousies or fears they would not want you to do things just cos they will not be able to do it.

As written in the book ‘Secret’ by Rhonda Byrne, 'our thoughts become things'. There is an illustration of thoughts materializing into things wherein a person imagines having a feather with a particular pattern on it. One day as he is about to enter his office building, he stumbles upon exactly the same feather. Such is the power of thought.

When we want good things to happen to us, we must attract them by thinking that it is already a part of our lives.

Similarly if we brood over unwanted things, we are in turn  attracting them into our lives thus allowing bad things to happen to us.

Lastly let go of unwanted things and think of only positive things thus making our lives better.

‘It takes but one positive thought when given a chance to survive and thrive an entire army of negative thoughts’

Gonna miss you baby :(

                                            (picture courtesy Raj )

Having been a part of our lives for almost 20 years, you have embarked on a new journey of life today .It is said that humans these days are more attached to material comforts than other humans and I don’t mind being a part of the herd in your case. We have been through the life’s journey together and there is no one in the family who has not traveled in you 

When your new owner came looking for dad we dint know he had come for you. In a few minutes, dad came in and declared that ‘you were ready to go’ . He had held onto you like his dear friend. Though he had driven more luxurious ones, we could say he was too fond of you to let go. He said only one thing after his small ‘talk’ with the guy- “Today am letting go my Lakshmi”. Don’t know if he feels the same the day he marries off his daughters 

I couldn’t bear to see you being taken away so I went to the small-house (as we generally call it) on the pretext of ironing the clothes.  All I could hear was the guy trying to bring you to life and that you wouldn’t budge. After some time I came out only to see the empty space where you stood . I rushed inside and told mom that you were gone. She had a smile on her face as she told me that you were standing outside.  I rushed back to check if you were there and that was when dad asked the keys of access and bro’s Yamaha. By the time I returned with the keys, dad was not to be seen. I stood near the gate to get the last glimpse of you and saw the tow vehicle arrive to take you away, afar from our lives.

Tears started pouring in yet I kept staring at you till I couldn’t see you anymore. Then dad came and said ‘she’s gone forever’. Inside the house, mom was looking at you through the kitchen window and as I went in all she said was- ‘see her going away in pride’. I could just feel the pain she had. 

Now after returning from office, I don’t get to see a grey Premier Padmini standing near the gate eagerly waiting for the house-mates to return after their day’s work 

You still remain in our hearts today and will be forever. <3 you

P.S. This was written almost an year ago but posted now

Ekla Cholo re...

Love this song for the in depth meaning and beautiful rendition by Amitabh :)

Bengali Script

যদি তোর ডাক শুনে কেউ না আসে তবে একলা চলো রে।
একলা চলো, একলা চলো, একলা চলো, একলা চলো রে॥
যদি কেউ কথা না কয়, ওরে ওরে ও অভাগা,
যদি সবাই থাকে মুখ ফিরায়ে সবাই করে ভয়—
তবে পরান খুলে
ও তুই মুখ ফুটে তোর মনের কথা একলা বলো রে॥
যদি সবাই ফিরে যায়, ওরে ওরে ও অভাগা,
যদি গহন পথে যাবার কালে কেউ ফিরে না চায়—
তবে পথের কাঁটা
ও তুই রক্তমাখা চরণতলে একলা দলো রে॥
যদি আলো না ধরে ওরে ওরে ও অভাগা,
আলো না ধরে যদি ঝর বাদলে আঁধার রাতে দুয়ার ধেয়ে ঘরে-
তবে বজ্রানলে আপন বুকের পাঁজরা জ্বালিয়ে একলা জ্বলো রে।।

 English Translation

If they answer not to thy call walk alone.

If they are afraid and cower mutely facing the wall,

O thou unlucky one,

open thy mind and speak out alone.

If they turn away, and desert you when crossing the wilderness,

O thou unlucky one,

trample the thorns under thy tread,

and along the blood-lined track travel alone.

If they do not hold up the light when the night is troubled with storm,

O thou unlucky one,

with the thunder flame of pain ignite thy own heart

and let it burn alone.

 Sometimes in life when the people whom you trust let you down, its time for you to move on in life alone.
Stand for what you feel is right and go ahead, never lose hope for its the hope in yourself that keeps you going. Never be afraid to walk alone. If people realize your worth they will return else think that their part in your life's story is over..


Courtesy :Rabindranath Tagore

Sometimes.....

Sometimes things don’t work out,
This doesn’t mean nothing will.
One thing isn’t everything,
Now isn’t forever –
Even though it may feel like it.

Give yourself time
To see things clearly.
What we feel
Isn’t always true.
In time the disappointment will pass,
Your feelings will change,
Your life will be different,
You will have new dreams.

No matter how hard we try
We can’t hold onto today.
It will pass.
So we must hold its joys
And its disappointments
With open hands
Because they weren’t meant to stay,
But to fill today’s purpose.

Let go of today’s disappointments
So your hands will be free
To accept tomorrow’s blessings.
Life is not just one day of your life,
But all of your tomorrows.
Each day has its own happiness.
Enjoy today but then move on
To enjoy all of your tomorrows……



Source: unknown

Relationships

Most people enter into relationships with an eye toward what they can get out of them, rather than what they can put into them.  The purpose of a relationship is to decide what part of yourself you'd like to see "show up," not what part of another you can capture and hold.  The purpose of a relationship is not to have another who might complete you; but to have another with whom you might share your completeness.   ''     -Neale Donald Walsch When someone is in your life for a REASON . . . It is usually to meet a need you have expressed. They have come to assist you through a difficulty, to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally, or spiritually. They may seem like a godsend, and they are! They are there for the reason you need them to be.

Then, without any wrong doing on your part, or at an inconvenient time, this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end.

Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away. Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand.

What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled, their work is done. The prayer you sent up has been answered. And now it is time to move on.

When people come into your life for a SEASON . . .Because your turn has come to share, grow, or learn.They bring you an experience of peace, or make you laugh. They may teach you something you have never done. They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy. Believe it! It is real! But, only for a season.

LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons; things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation. Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person, and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life. It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant

Courtesy: http://positive-thoughts.typepad.com/inner_wisdom/.

Dear Life....

Sometimes you make me happy by giving me all that I ask from you and sometimes what you give is not even close to what I can think of. You encompass both good and bad, beauty and ugly and present it in your own form and make us wonder your capabilities of making things happen. When I look back and also regard the present, I realize that your richness lies is in bringing all these experiences together and weaving a beautiful tapestry of them.

You make me hasten my pace when am slow and apply a brake if am too fast by making me sick thus asking me to slow-down, allowing me to rest and emerge fitter and stronger. You have showed me that when I say “yes” to you, it means I should be ready to accept the good, bad and the ugly . You seem to be like an ever-flowing river that flows smoothly and turns around obstacles and difficulties. You have taught me to look beyond the difficulties that come my way thus making me more self-reliable and confident.

You squeeze me like a lemon to bring out the best in me by offering more stress and obstacles. You force me into accepting responsibilities, care for others and thus return to you what I have received from you.

 
In the course of time, many things have happened , but not every happening is significant. I have now learned to skip and not mull over or get bogged down by happenings that could have been accidental, coincidental or negative, and therefore they do not say much to me anymore..

 

You have taught me that one can lead life to the fullest by making use of our time effectively. Though there is ample time in our means, we should only undertake what we are capable of and also see to it that others benefit from our existence and not be the reason for the destruction

You have helped me understand the real me and have taught me that I have the best gift of self

Am a lot braver today than what I had been a couple of years ago. You have taught me to give more than to receive, love than to hate, forget than to remember , chill than be stressed..

Having said all these i expect you to treat me fairly and help me in moving ahead

Regards