I am cursed, do you know why...

... Because i am a woman...

Her ill-fated luck starts the moment she is born. Rather than being treated as a good fortune or luck to the family, she will be looked down upon as a misfortune which has dawned upon the family.

She is treated as a debit to the family while the brothers who have been born before or after her are treated as credits..

Is it her fault that she is born a girl? Why do people, even though in 21st century still believe this?

Where do the talks of 'women empowerment' and 'beti bachao' andolans end up? Though years have rolled by and literacy percentage has increased, why has the temperament of people not changed?

Yes, i do agree that males carry the dominant genes from a family and that is one of the scientific reasons why it is necessary to have a male child but isn't the girl child carrying a part of your genes too (which may or may not be recessive)?

In a country like India with its vast geographical area and a place where goddesses are worshipped, there is a highly dominated patriarchal society and a recessive matriarchal society. Where do we stand in terms of gender equality?

We all want to make the world a better place to live in. What are we doing to the people who are trying to educate and bring to light the atrocities against women?

In recent times, we all know that the documentary pertaining to the rape victim (Nirbhaya- 26th December 2012 case) that was aired in UK and subsequently available on the internet was removed following the objections by various people. Where is the right to speech?

Is there going to be an end to the gender discrimination or do we have to silently continue chanting - 'Naa aana iss desh laado! The time has not arrived for you to get the respect that you deserve nor is your value understood'.

What's on your mind?

This post is dedicated to my best friend G who has been asking me to write about 'how and why we need to express ourselves'? I had been putting off this topic as I hadn't taken it seriously but today for some reason I have realized why it is very important to express oneself. So G this post is for you (and mind you am writing before the deadline you had given me- close(d) friend's birthday. Though you had asked me to write a book this is the best I could do)

In one real-life situation, I was asked a question as to what according to me is needed to make a relationship stronger? I was taken aback on with this question and that too from a person whom I had just met.

I took a deep breath and told that the strength of a relationship lies in honesty, straight-forwardness and also the fact that we must learn to express ourselves in a way where-in we have to put forth our views in front of the people who are with us such that it doesn't inflict pain (read as sugar coated where necessary). The person may have not understood the underlying meaning behind my words but I strongly feel that communicating our views and concerns will definitely make way for a stronger bond between people thus helping us in the long run.

More often than not, people part mainly because of misunderstandings and a lot of presumptions caused due to mis-communication or the lack of it which can generally be avoided by sitting and pouring out.

There was yet another incident when G and myself had confronted another good friend of ours who had distanced herself from us abruptly. The answer that we got was that we can express ourselves well while she couldn't. If only she had expressed herself, we could still have been the thick of friends.

Well as a matter-of-fact, these are just a couple of incidents though in reality there are a lot of incidents where we need to talk. Say for instance a married couple, parents-children, manager-reportee, if need arises strangers, a guy and a girl when they are contemplating marriage (as is the case in arranged marriages) where the trust and knowledge about each other can increase only by expressing.

A lot of people face problem in expressing themselves as
a. They feel that their language quotient is not good enough
b. They tend to their egos more than the relationships
c. Their insecurities, for instance there are a lot of people who feel that if I tell my friend, partner, sibling about the issue, then they may feel that the information can be used against them at a later point of time and also that the former is considered insignificant than the latter or that the former will be degraded
d. Mostly people do not know how and why they should communicate.
e. Lack of confidence

The truth is unless we express people won't know what is going on in our minds. Sometimes the people around us can give better clarity and simpler resolution to the in-numerous battles that the mind is engaged in.

What more, even facebook, the most popular social networking site asks- 'what's on your mind' to update the status?

Come on people lets make our lives as well as the lives of people around us and most importantly of those whom we are close to, a lot simpler by expressing ourselves better..

If you have been an introvert, start by talking to your people whom you are close to such as your friends, family or better your reflection in the mirror to get the confidence to talk to people.

Guess what my favorite author agrees with me. This is what she had shared on her FB wall :)

So what's on your mind?

Proximity of Relationships

The closer the relationship, the more effort one needs to make to understand them. Somebody becomes closer and dearer to us only as we understand them better. If they understand us, they enjoy the closeness of the relationship.


If we understand them better, then we enjoy the closeness. Instead if we are expecting the other to comply with us all the time while not understanding the limitations, possibilities, needs and capabilities of that person, then conflict happens; it is a given. Unfortunately, the closest relationships have more conflict going on than between enemies.


If we are to decide what happens in our lives, we should include everything and everybody into our understanding. Enhancing our understanding to a point where we can look beyond people's madness also. There are wonderful people around us, but once in a while they like to go crazy for a few minutes just like we get volatile. If we don't understand that, we will end up losing them. If we do understand, then we will know how to handle them. Life is not always linear; we have to do many things to keep it going.Whether it is a question of personal relationships or professional management, one needs understanding; otherwise, we will not have fruitful relationships.


The way we are right now, the very quality of our life is decided by the type of relationships we hold. We should make an effort to understand people around us.